One of the all-time great "what were we thinking" moments for mainstream audiences (see also Durst, Fred), Vanilla Ice - the Ed Wood of lyricism - has achievements from this period that can't be denied, as he did sell millions of copies of To The Extreme at a time when the concept of a white rapper was shakier than it is now. That's not to say Ice is nearly as influential as he thinks he is. In actuality, he almost killed it for white rappers in the spotlight.
Let's face it - Ice's rhymes are so uniquely awful they kind of approach their own sort of absurd reality. Hell, it's almost prophetic when he raps "Now it's Saturday, the day you hate most / Why? Because I'm coast to coast." Seriously, what the hell is that? And what is "moanin' & groanin' like she could take on the A-Team"? Or "You be the hand and Iceman will be the glove"? There are so many failed attempts to come off cool on To The Extreme it could shrink your scroll bar down to the size of a pea. But I'll spare you for now and we'll just leave it that Ice writes some of the stupidest, non-sequiter-filled, grammar-killing, mind-numbing rhymes in hip hop history. Oh, and let's not forget his boasting, and he does a lot of that.
That said, it's a mostly listenable trainwreck thanks to some decent dance tracks, enjoyable samples (such as on "Stop That Train," where he uses the same sample the Beastie Boys used on "B-Boy Bouillabaisse" to lesser results), some funny moments and the sheer novelty value of some of these songs. After all, you certainly won't forget this album after you've heard it, and some lyrics might even make you chuckle long after. For example, "I Love You" is a love song that's here for the sole purpose of pushing Ice into the teen idol market, and it's so comic it's kind of classic. And "Rosta Man" has to be heard to be fully appreciated. However, some moments are just plain bad. "Hooked" is a song about not letting your significant other run your life, but the backing track is weak and Ice gives a lackluster performance that actually makes it worse. Then there's a sex song called "Life Is A Fantasy" (another non-sequiter!) that has a slow tempo that exposes him somewhat. And after a while, there gets to be so many samples - Jackson 5, Wild Cherry, James Brown (but then, a lot of rappers sampled the Godfather), Vincent Price (the laugh from "Thriller!"), and most famously Queen, plus many others - that it kind of sounds desperate. MC Hammer suffered from the same problem, come to think of it.
It's well worth hearing simply for a snapshot of a silly time in music history, or even if the bizarre spectacle attracts you. Oddly enough, it wasn't this album that signaled his fall from grace. Nor was it his movie, Cool As Ice, which is now a bad movie night staple. No, it was the image he and his label put on while promoting the release, such as his fraudulent biography (which Ice quickly disowned, to his credit) and the infamous claim that adding one note to the bass riff means it's not really a Queen sample (um, what?). Plus, his record label, which he would frequently bash in later years got him dressed up on tour in MC Hammer-esque outfits that made him look like a total buffoon. It's kind of a shame Ice couldn't quite grow and mature from this, as his subsequent public appearances (like his infamous Surreal Life appearance, and of course his trashing of the MTV set), as well as his albums, showed him bitter and short-tempered towards the whole mess, even if he can seem like a pretty cool guy in his more lighthearted moments. Check out Platinum Underground for a prime example of his difficulty with his past, and that's one of the only reasons to ever hear it.
**1/2
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